I’ve often wondered why I feel this desperate need to please other people. Why am I afraid of conflict or disagreement?
A friend and I were having a simple conversation about a book series. I said I didn’t care for it and gave solid reasons. My friend began to refute my reasons, but with anger. I was left feeling like I had done something wrong and needed to apologize.
When I am in a situation with a clear leader, I have this strange need to be approved by that person, to be in their inner circle. Through prayer, I have come to understand that this need comes from an unavailable father. That’s insightful information, but what do I do with it? In my humble opinion, I need to look for a good counselor who is also a Christian to assist me through the process.
The upside of this dilemma is a desire to please God in everything. He listens to my “reasons” when I fail, but He never chastises me in anger. He is always gentle and persistent in teaching me His ways. I want to have His heart in everything because I crave to please Him.
Live in harmony with one another; do not be haughty but associate with the lowly. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil; consider what is good before all people.
If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all people. Romans 12:16-18
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